Do whatever it takes to appreciate the wonder of the unique expression of Life that you are. When you can do that, you will live heaven on Earth.Joan Borysenko
This week I was fortunate to attend an Intimacy and Relationship workshop facilitated by a highly skilled Sex and Intimacy Coach, Dr. HazelGrace Yates. I had no idea what to expect but am always open to learning fresh and innovative ways to connect with my partner, Steve. (It was his idea!)
I’m also very interested in strengthening intimate connections with my friends, family and clients. As I continue to invite more richness, joy and intention into my life, I’ve felt more resilient and purposeful. The more I lean into opportunities, the more I find. (Funny how that happens, huh?) Like you, my job is extremely fulfilling but it is also extremely demanding and I can feel overwhelmed without actively refilling my own cup.
For example, the timely “Valentine’s Day” workshop by Dr. Yates, taught us some more deeply informative open ended statements of appreciation, gratitude and validation to share with our partner.
“I feel most solid when _______________.”
“I am in awe when I see/hear/feel you __________________.”
“I feel scared when __________________.”
Expressing these sentiments and often deeply rooted emotions in a safe and loving environment created an opportunity for deep listening, compassion and stronger connection. We all remarked about how these statements are useful and needed as part of our everyday commitment to each other, not just Valentine’s Day…or “Hallmark” Day, as some feel. Let’s face it, we’re in deep trouble if we wait for only one day a year to express our love for someone!
Ok but what does this have to do with improving resiliency? Well, deep emotional connections are associated with improved health and longevity, whether it’s in a romantic relationship, a close circle of friends, or strong social connections in your community. Social support strengthens immunity, releases feel-good hormones, helps protect cardiovascular health and keeps the ship of life afloat. Humans are relational animals, which is why isolation is dire and deadly.
~ adapted from Fried. Why You Burn out and How to Revive by Joan Borysenko, Ph.D.
As I continue to witness examples of post hurricane(s) resiliency in the survivors on this once leafless, horribly decimated yet beautiful island I now call home, I’m committed to deepening my connection with those whom I am blessed to share my life with. Creating a full, juicy and purposeful life doesn’t come by defaulting to becoming a victim of the busyness disease. It is created by welcoming challenge, allowing vulnerability, intentional living and seeking opportunities for deep connection. My hope is that you also strengthen your resiliency muscle by inviting more intimate connections with those around you.
Shine YOUR heart!
…deep emotional connections are associated with improved health and longevity, whether it’s in a romantic relationship, a close circle of friends, or strong social connections in your community.